Unbelievable

I have been looking for a pair of flat black shoes for well over a year (before iLyn was born, to be exact) and have had little to no luck. I guess I am super picky. It's kind of a joke. I am picky, but I think the real problem is that I don't really know how to spend money on myself anymore, so if I am going to spend money (it took me six months to buy a purse. Pathetic), I want it to be something I love and I just haven't found it yet (horribly long sentence). So, David gave me some money and I headed to the mall. I had not been shopping in a mall in almost seven months. I went into the the mall twice before we moved out here, but it was just to run into a store and run back out. I was a little nervous because I took all of the girls, but I thought it would be okay because the runner was going to be confined to a stroller. All would work out well.

We got there, got the two girls into strollers (the five year old is the best!), and went in. Oh my word! Seriously, if there is an economic crisis, you would never have known by going to this mall. It was completely packed. It was totally absurd. I wanted to run, but I was determined to get some shoes. This was my last hope. So, we started shopping. If anyone knows me from my past, they know that I loved to shop. Loved it! I could find a way to spend six hours, just in Target. I rarely bought anything (until I was older and had a little bit of money), but I just loved the store atmosphere. It was always wonderful. That is why it pains me to make this next statement: I absolutely hate the mall! I mean, hate it with the fire of a thousand suns (I think that is a quote, but it might not be exact so no plagiarism suing, okay :) It was probably one of the worst experiences of my life. My girls were not too bad (Bo figured out how to undo the belt on the stroller and kept wandering off, Boo could barely steer the stroller and kept running over my heels, iLyn had a meltdown or two), but it was the stores and the people and the fact that they don't make these little stores for strollers. UGH! It was horrendous and I never want to go back again, at least not alone with my kids (blanket statement, but it was truly that awful for me). I went into every shoe store and department store and guess what I found... nothing. Wait, not true, I did get David some new, well deserved clothes and found a ton of cute things for the girls (I did not purchase anything for them, however), but nada for me. David made me (over the phone) get myself something, but even that was an ordeal. And, after six hours, I felt depressed and like a failure because I still have not found my shoes. What a joke.

So, I am not at all sad we live a half hour away from a mall. I don't foresee myself going back any time soon (unless I am with someone and it is NOT on a Saturday). It's just too much work with little ladies and for my exhausted mind. It's frustrating for me to see that a large is now the size of an extra small and that that extra small large t-shirt, costs as much as my mortgage. I don't know how the people that run these companies sleep at night (probably not very well lately). It is just interesting to me and unbelievable.

P.S. My apologies to those who read this before I did an edit/spell check. It hurt my eyes too (I wrote it early this morning). Sorry.